I am not an expert but this is how I see it. Many gay men don’t expect much from relationships and put up with a lot in relationships. Many people belive in sexual freedom and its actully acceptable. Now it’s not just about sex, it’s about flirting with others, treating your partner with little respect.
Now irrespective of a monogomius or open realtionships we all should be treated with great care and respect. William and myself do not have an open relationship, and that our choice. We all actully get in a serious relationship to heal our past. To heal what may have been missing from our parents, family, friends or a past relationship. To heal from that is to experience a deep emotional supportive relationship with your adult partner. I do not belive that our past should not influence our present or future. In anybodies lives, we come to a point were we have to stop blaming our parents and take control of our own life’s.
Now unless your relationship is healthy and you both need care, conversion, nourishment and the need to be with each other, then maybe you need to think what’s in it for you. Many people, gay and straight have a need to be codependent, to take care of other and not themselves. That was me in the beginning. I was scared to face my fears and to value myself.
Here is what we should expect.
Your partner should apologies when he has emotionally neglected you. And with this I am not referring to drama, I am referring to listening to your emotional soul.
Your partner should never belittle you, shame you, tease you when it’s no longer funny. He should never make you feel inferior.
You should never be hit. No exception here.
Being drunk is not an excuse for behaviour that is unacceptable.
We deserve respect, kindness and love. Not each second but constantly, as is that not why we in a realtionship.
Intimacy, emotionally and sexually. Being intimate is not sexual, it’s been able to be honest, trust someone and being able to talk without fear of rejection. In other words, to be yourself 100%, with your partner and feel safe, loved and complete. And yes we also need great sex where we can be honest, free of guilt and allow ourself to be who we are meant to be.