The way I see intimacy in a long term relationship. Yes sex!


this is the way I see it, you don’t have to agree. When I met William he was a student, second year. He was 19. Initially I was very reluctant to even consider a date. I was mid twenties. We from the outside looking in we had nothing in common, the only attraction was physically. William is a tall guy and pretty well build. I on the other hand am short legged. So sure sex was a possibility but that was all I could foresee.

On our second date I did sleep over at his place close to were he was studying. It was let’s say very much a students place, small very brightly painted and the necessity only. His shower had no door or shower curtain. This was not a long plan relationship. We simply has some very awkward fumbling sex. He was very passionate and slightly obsessed with me. Why, I still am not sure of. Fast forward 5 months, William is staying with me in my city aprtment, he commuting to class evert day, and unlike my student days, he preferred to partied with me than his fellow class mates. We did go to plenty of student parties etc. and I will admit it was fun.

it did not take me long to realize that this was an incredibly intense seriously relationship. I was not in the same space about this relationship at that time. I never fully put my heart and soul into it. I always though William was too young and to attractive for me. Nearly two years into our relationship that all changed, William organized a road trip and not just a road trip but one that had been detailed to everything. Here I stood one weekend on a beach with this man and his heart and soul were completely devoted to me. My own insecurities about our diverse different backgrounds age difference soon melted away. 20130406-064452.jpg

Here I was in to a relationship that was by all standard very intense and serious. William was obsessed with me in a non frightening scary way. The most interesting fact is that we are two very different people, but we work so well together, yes we did have to overcome a lot, and did have our our own challenges. One thing that we both agree on is faithful to the others. Sex is a big part of a new relationship, and yes it could still be awkward and strange, but as the years and our own maturity it’s reached Olympic level. We are so familiar with each other. The sex become more intense and our intimacy familiar, comfortable and I for the first time trusted someone and loved that person with no boundaries. We still hold hands when watching tv, he also runs my bath, recharges my toothbrush and to me those actions explain volumes about us. We have an amazing sex life, maybe due to the stresss of work it’s not a frequent as it was but its always there. We never plan a date night for intimacy. Each day is one. I sit with William when he baths and he oftens grabs a coffee and chats to me while I shower. We talk, we talk lots. We also have days we are just present in each other’s companies. With life you do have the dry sessions, but that’s no excuse to look outward. We both belive in monogamy, we tried a threesome one night, it just pear shaped and was never meant to be. So long term relationship the dynamics change but when you intimate there is no better feeling being with someone who knows you and honestly the sex gets better, and it’s not just sex.



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