It’s not all it’s cracked out to be,

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so sometimes being the gay child is not always what’s it’s made out to be. Sometimes it’s just plain awful, well for them it is but not necessary for me.  Being the gay child and the one without children, I am definitely looked at very differently.  I may have a partner of 11 plus years, it still does not count. Sorry I never gave you more grandchildren.  My legacy is much bigger than you will ever imagine. Maybe in your eyes I am a disappointment, deal with it.

My family has made it very clear that they don’t approve and have not accepted me 100%. And you know what it’s okay with me.  I am living a very contented life in an amazing home, with a man that in my eyes is a true gentlemn and I did get luckly.  Sure we have had our bad times, and more than bad times. However we have and still have an amzing life. We make it count. Now not all parents are like that, Williams mom is from a very rural town and cannot be more embracing of her son.

This has been the situation for many years, until I woke up and realized I deserve more.  I visit very seldom. Both my siblings and there families have never made the effort to visit. We life in differnt cities that do require flights or a good 2 day road trip. We have lived in our current house just on 7 years, so as far as I am concerned the effort cannot always be from one side. The camels break broke tonigh, I was given a birthday present and it was a very small gesture. However I know I should never compare but my brother and his wife got a real bells and whistle present each as gifts. Money is not in short supply with my family.  The reality it actully hurt me more than I thought it would. So I am just doing what I need to do and distance myself. That’s the reality. I will always be around when they need anything that is critical, however today I walked into our home and it dawned on me, they have never visited. They know how hard we worked for this house, and how proud we are to be living in this big old house in the leafy streets close to were our family home was.  It’s not about bragging or anything, it’s about actully being apart of my life, gay and all.

Thats the ways I see it… Ivan. IMG_1011


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